The Prelude to The Gutter

Ash pondered his fate in The Gutter. Would it be one man or would they run in a group? He wondered if shock would set in, if he would go numb before they started to cut into his chest, flaying his torso. He was morbidly curious just what that would be like, watching as some street surgeon methodically cut him open. If he couldn't feel the pain, would he really care? The image of the dull knife forcing itself through his skin was all too vibrant. Would he last long enough to watch them harvest any of his organs or would their search for cybernetic implants kill him first? Try as they might, they would find nothing aside from his law enforcement and birth tags.

That morbid curiosity turned to sudden rage as images of Marie flooded his mind. He had spent those last weeks drinking himself half to death and then waking up the next day to do it all again. Sitting in that corner, shelling out money to kill himself shot by shot. He had lost faith in everything he had believed in when he took his job. He wanted to help keep people safe, he wanted to stop the innocent people from getting caught up in firefights in the low tiers, to stop black market trades, the very harvesting he had just been imagining. He wanted to be respected and lauded for his work, was that selfish?

He served happily, he felt satisfaction as he brought closure to every case, caught every thief or murderer, brought a missing child back to their parents, chased down a fleeing criminal, brought in rapists, gave testimony to ensure that those who had done wrong were punished as severely as the law dictated... and it had all just become a joke in Zero-Five. All the respect and dignity that kept him standing upright with pride was dashed upon the orders he was given. If he had shot that child he would be without all this bullshit pushing down on him? The image and act of killing the child would follow him to his dying day, and that was much worse in some respects. At least he got to fight for his life, right?

"Damnit!" Ash screamed, grabbing the bottle by the neck and hurling it across the kitchen where it busted upon the wall and fell to the floor in a puddle of alcohol and broken glass, streaks of the alcohol running down the wall. He had to force himself not to grab more items to begin wrecking his home with. He could, honestly, knock the walls down with his bare fists if they wouldn't crumble into bloody ruin along the way. He felt he suddenly had an idea of what it was like to live with terminal illness or to be living on borrowed time as some gang kingpin gave you so many days to pay back the money you borrowed before he broke your kneecaps and then let you die on your own in a fucking waste drain.

It was unfair, that was a major factor but the largest part of it all was her. Marie had taken him from the bottom of his depression in one evening and thrown him into orbit. Looking into her eyes, there was nothing that could get him down, the smell of her banished bad memories, her words drowned out all negativity and it was all true. She had just been the right woman in the right place to save him and the fact that he would not likely survive the night made it all the more bitter. He wanted to throw a tantrum like a child and scream about how unfair it was but... he'd just be wallowing alone on his kitchen floor. He didn't have a parent to sway into doing what he wanted, here.

Ash exhaled raggedly and braced himself with his hands on the edge of the counter, hanging his head down between his arms. He could smell the alcohol on himself, now, and sighed. He was sure that was a thing that dickhead Vanderbilt had mentioned. Somewhere in hell there was a spot reserved for him and Ash would find a way from his own spot in hell to kick the living shit out of that asshole. Hell was an outdated concept, honestly, but it remained in the human lexicon for figurative purposes. It had left with the Christians when they had made their march for war. Ash had always known that Juno hid things from the public, every government does because, on the whole, people were panicky animals and the smallest hint of bad news could cause some ridiculous riot. From that riot would come claims of police brutality and from that would come very clear messages from Juno that the citizens chose to be there-- they were welcome to leave if they had issues with it.

Ash couldn't count how many things that had been swept under the rug but he acknowledged some of them were for the good of the city, items not quite worth mention because they would be more trouble than they were worth. For a long time he had only heard of Gutter duty as an outdated thing, some ancient practice too barbaric for the civilized, modern people of today. The fact was, though, troublemakers ended up disappearing and he had not gone on without noticing the mysterious absence of certain people over the course of a night. Some were murders that Juno fast-tracked and declared were simply unsolvable and every bit of evidence collected was suddenly gone. Espher was certainly a damn sight better than living in the outlying settlements but there was no question that when the citizens had voted to bring the Obelisk to a government level they did so without knowing what exactly it could do.

It was funny, really. The city-- at the time it was a large city slowly growing outward to begin consuming surrounding cities-- had lost all faith in human decency (in politicians, at least) and Juno had so reluctantly pushed their candidate to the fore. It was programmed to be perfectly logical, incapable of being bribed, unable to be intimidated, never to be found in a sex scandal, always weighing the city and its population and doing this or that. Everything from public transport schedules to allocating police forces as needed per sector, all the way down to what was or was not available  to experience in the form of art. Countless albums, paintings, sculptures, books, pictures, and other forms of art had been confiscated, put into the vault of Lucretia (or the Library of Lucretia, alternatively) deep in the core of the Lucretia sector, near the Obelisk and heavy guard. People realized, then, they had only traded one devil for another.

Ash sighed as he pulled his shirt off over his head, not wanting to both with the buttons, and entered the bathroom. He looked at the mirror set flush with the wall and appraised himself. He needed to shave, he needed more sleep, he needed to brush his hair, he needed to figure out just what Marie saw in him when it came to looks. He was certainly not ugly but he was certain there were much more handsome men she met on a daily basis, that hit on her or offered her ridiculous endorsements and sponsorships for a date. At least that was how he saw it. Maybe it was different, he could see men being far too scared to approach her. With a heaved sigh, Ash stepped out of his pants and boots until he was naked and stepped into the shower. The pane on the wall immediately lit up and he selected one of his custom entries that set the water temperature and pressure just how he liked it. Then the display shrunk down to the bottom left corner and the pane displayed telepane channels. He wasn't terribly interested so he changed the channel and subchannel to one of a few hundred music stations before he turned and embraced the warm embrace of the water.

Hanging his head beneath the showerhead, holding himself up with his palms against the wall, Ash breathed slow and stead, wanting to wash the situation away like the water running down the drain, to see it all just go away... but things were never that easy. He had just finished lathering his hair up to place it under the showerhead when the pane chimed. His head went under the wash and he blindly tapped the pane. "Yea?" he called out, working his hands through his hair. The voice from the pane excited him and he was instantly free of worry. "Guess who." Marie said, winking at the camera. Ash slung his head out of the wash and looked at her, his face creasing into a smile despite his poor spirits. "The stripper I ordered?" he teased, looking at her, she could see a small vision of him adjacent to the camera and she shook her head. "I put her out of a job. Now are you going to let me in or do I need to break your door down?" she inquired, tilting her head. "Yea, let me key it." Ash spoke, typing in a sequence of numbers on a pad to the left of the pane and unlocked the door. "Thank you, now you better take care of that." she said before moving in.

Ash began to ask her what she meant but the sudden sting in his eyes answered him and he quickly shoved his head back under the flow of water, rinsing his eyes thoroughly and washing his hair thoroughly. The rest of his shower was hasty and bare-bones, wanting to be next to her as soon as possible. He heard her heeled boots clacking against the floor  toward the bathroom. He swept the shower curtain open and stared right into her eyes-- well, he had to look down quite a bit but he made eye-contact. She was wearing a smart black blouse and coat... with denim jeans that looked as if they were molded just for her. "I missed you." Ash said, water running down his form and thumping quietly against the bathtub. She placed a hand on his chest and smiled, running her fingers down, letting her nails scrape his skin. Ash was about to stop her from moving below his hips but she stopped on her own, fingers tracing left and right. "Looks like you need a shave." she spoke, smirking.
"Yeah? Where?" He inquired, grinning.
Marie laughed and shook her head "Honestly? Both."
"Oh yeah? Well I was going to grow it out down here and shave your name into it. Thought you'd be flattered."
"You know, I have to say that is something I've never had a man do for me."
"Yea, it's gonna stay that way." Ash teased and she grinned up at him.

As Ash leaned down toward her she sighed  and placed her hands on the sides of his neck and they kissed for several moments before it broke away and he looked at her with a completely different look on his face. He was happier, brighter, more responsive. She was about to speak but Ash flicked his fingers at her space and sprinkled it with water. Her face scrunched up and she laughed before her hand shot for the pane and she tapped her finger against the pane, rapidly lowering the temperature before slapping the on button and giving him a soft shove to make sure the spray of cold water caught him fully. He cursed and sputtered, shutting the water off with a touch of his hand. "You need a warning label." Ash said, shaking his head so that his hair whipped water in her direction. "You ass!" she shouted, laughing with him as he stepped out of the shower.

"So... you said you needed to see me, your tone was pretty... grave. I was worried if something happened at work." Marie spoke, watching Ash towel off.
Wiping his face with the towel, Ash nodded "Yea, something all right."
"Don't leave me in suspense, Ash. What is it? I'm guessing its the reason there's a busted bottle in the kitchen floor?"
"Yea, I... just kind of threw a fit. Look, I don't know exactly what we have, you know, us... but I had to see you before I went into work."
Marie seemed to weigh his words, not quite sure what they were, herself. "And I'm here, Cherub. Tell me what happened."
"You ever go to The Gutter?"
"I've... been a few times, yes. It was all for charity donations and benefits."
"No, the -real- gutter, the bottom rung."
"I... No, I never have."
"Well, I'm being posted there tonight and for seven days after. I won't be coming home, they've got bunks down there."
"Isn't that place pretty awful?"
"Yea, yea it is. It's been about six years since anyone posted there came back and when they showed up they weren't all there. Literally, like missing limbs and bodyparts."
"Who is going with you?"
"No one. It's just going to be me. I can sleep during the day when patrol runs through regularly but at night I'm going to be the only cop in the sector working in The Gutter."
"This is why..."
"Yea, I … like I said, I don't know what this is but I want more of it, I want to follow it all the way to wherever you and I end up."
"It's only been a day, Cherub but... I know what you mean. We fit very well with one another."

It was true, Marie felt like she fit perfectly into every recess and hole in Ash's life as if she had been made just for that. It was a wonderful feeling, to know someone so well in so short a time. She knew what he was thinking every time he opened his mouth. In all his awkward stories and tangents and difficulty to convey details on certain things correctly, she knew what he meant and it wasn't without it's strange nature, it was very weird but it worked. Ash finished toweling off and dropped the towel in a hamper while Marie forged the path ahead into the bedroom. Ash got his underwear on and sat down with her on the bed, his hand grabbing her own and lacing his fingers with her's. She turned and smiled at him, moving to kiss him for a moment before shoving him onto his back and climbing on top of him. She nestled in against the crook of his neck and he hooked his arm around her slight frame, his free hand holding one of her own. If only he could freeze this moment, to exist here forever...  but the fact was that this might be the last time he ever got to feel her nestled against him, smell the scent of her skin or shampoo, to hear her voice, her laugh-- that laugh that was infectious and almost always present, as if she were in the best mood all the time.

"I just... if there is something I want to do before I'm basically put to death I want to spend time with you. The Gutter is where they put you when they want you to die. I guess the reward of surviving it is keeping your job."
"I'm not going to worry about you." Marie whispered in his ear.
"What does that mean?"
"I'm not afraid you'll die. You'll survive it, Ashley."
Ash was surprised that he didn't flinch reflexively at being called by his full name but she said it with a clear, caring tone. "I'm glad someone believes I will." he muttered somewhat darkly.
"If you just sit there and thing about how awful it's going to be it's just going to be awful. Keep your head up-- well, I guess down is wiser here but just think about everything we'll do when you get back."
"That's a way to look at it."
"That's how -you- should look at it. Listen to me, Ashley, I'm not sure what we have here, either, but I want it just as much as you. I have so many things to show you and things I want to do with you—"
"You're not talking about the same things that your words are putting in my head."
Marie grinned "Bear with me, Cherub. There is a lot to do and I'm certain you'll make it out and come back to me."

Hours passed between the two in conversation and for those hours Ash had completely forgotten the fear he had facing down his own execution. He had curled up with her, embraced her, kissed on her flesh for what seemed like an age. Marie had been growing more bold by the minute and there was a fire in her he hadn't seen before. Looking into her eyes she was hungry, she was ferocious, there was such determination. She had a hidden animal in her somewhere, he could remember seeing it that night they met, not realizing quite what it was until now. There was something coiled in her, ready to strike and it was vicious. Of course, this wasn't something she aimed at him, but he supposed in growing up she had learned a lot about how far people will go to screw you over, how petty and violent they were. He couldn't say that it was something that calmed him but it had been dominating the way toward sex, pawing at his chest, shedding her coat. Much to her surprise, as she went to take the waist of his boxershorts in her hands he stopped her. The look in her eyes could've broken his heart. She was confused, almost hurt.

Ash immediately took hold of her head and pulled her into a kiss. "Not like this I..." Ash sighed, pressing his forehead to her own and closing his eyes. "Not this way, not when I'm facing this. I know it's not some kind of pityfuck or last act of kindness, I know that, Marie. I just... I want to be there to enjoy it, all of me to be there, not to have half my head worried about the next week. I just want to be able to be there completely."
Marie's expression softened and she nodded with understanding, contenting herself to trail her fingernails along his abdomen. Honestly he wasn't sure what her fascination was, he hadn't had an etched abdomen in several years, it'd gone a bit soft. "How much longer?"
Ash craned his head to look at a clock mounted on the wall and sighed. "Five minutes, pretty much."
She nodded and slowly uncoiled herself from him, sitting next to him on the bed. "I mean it, Ashley, you're going to get through it fine."
Ash nodded "I know, I believe you. I need to get to Sector HQ and check in with the Sector Chief. He said something about giving me suitable firepower to hold my own if a group of psychos start shrieking and charging at me."
"Ooh, big guns. Sounds interesting."
"I kinda feel like shit for wanting to have an opportunity to use whatever I get."
"Oh, I totally get that. You're fine."

Ash spent the next few minutes pulling himself away from Marie and getting dressed, she had insisted on buttoning up his uniform so he let her have at it as he began to put on his gear, complete with his hat and recovered badge. He stood and looked at her, looked her over, absorbed every detail he could hold about her in silence. She seemed to understand what he was doing, she was smiling and looking into his eyes with her own. Perhaps she was doing the exact same thing he was? The communication hub chimed in a slot on his belt and he pulled it out, opening it. "That's all the time I have." he said, looking toward the door and then back at her. She nodded and walked with him to the door. "Listen, you can stay as long as you want. I don't care. There's probably food that will be going to waste anyway. "
"I have a lot of things I need to do now that I have the time for them but I'll gather my things and leave a note for you to come home to in seven days, hm?" Marie offered.
"Sounds good. I need to go but I'm going to miss you, Marie. A lot."
"Me too, Cherub. Me too."

Ash kissed her hungrily and embraced her with strength that threatened to practically snap her into pieces but she enjoyed every second. He had said his goodbyes to her as he ascended to the parking structure and fired up his patrol car. The ride to Sector HQ was quiet, he was trying to remember something his dad had said once when he was a child. About how death smiles at everyone and you just had to do the same. It was as relevant as he figured it would ever be. He had to get all senses of compassion of his head for this one. He had to kill all of his kindness, he had to be cold, cruel, brutal. This was a gauntlet to getting back to living and the life waiting for him was worth carving a path through the people of The Gutter should he be in doubt of their intentions. He had to be a monster to stand in a place of monsters, he felt.

Checking in, Ash had eyes on him and re-emergent whispers circulating around. He was without room to care for it now, though. He had met the Sector Chief in the armory and, true to his word, The Chief had a table spread with assault weapons. Rifles, shotguns, grenade rifles, rotary cannons, and dozens more. Frankly, explosives were too likely to harm innocent bystanders so they were right out. Rotary cannons were just too bulky to use in close quarters-- at least for him. He knew there were plenty of muscular and massive officers who could wield them effectively but Ash wasn't able to do that. Ultimately Ash had come down to a ScumThumper, it was a shotgun with a rotating series of four barrels and a large drum magazine. In riots it was idea when packed with non-lethal ammunition, you could spray down an entire crowd with one magazine and have them disperse. He wasn't sure what happened when using lethal ammunition but he expected it to be ugly and messy.

Ash had spoken with The Chief for a half hour before he was ten minutes from his post. With the ScumThumper slung over his shoulder he stood in the core elevator, riding it down until it reached the bottom level (as far as the Obelisk was concerned). As one rode down the tiers of Espher, the differences in the tiers was extremely apparent. Clean and bright slowly gave way to dirt, grime, and unpleasant smells.  He was at least ten tiers from The Gutter now and had to navigate his way to a special freight elevator to resume his descent. In this elevator he could not see outside, he just waited, watching the tier indicators flash by. As the elevator slowed to a halt, Ash took hold of the weapon and disengaged the safety switch, his thumb flicked a switch that caused a quiet whine to spin up as the barrels on the weapon rotated. Bracing himself for some manner of ambush, he held the weapon at his hip and kept his finger flat along the weapon, just above the trigger. The doors groaned and opened suddenly, leaving The Gutter open to see.